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How to avoid making poor decisions while away at college

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Written By Marc Lehman, Owner and Family Therapist at

U ARE HEARD LLC

Going away to college is an exciting time for any student. They are finally out on their own, away from the watchful eyes of their parents, and ready to start making their own decisions. However, this newfound freedom can sometimes lead to students making poor decisions that can have lasting consequences. Here are some tips on how to avoid making poor decisions while away at college.

  1. Know your limits. It is important to know your personal limits when it comes to alcohol and drugs. College is often times when students are first introduced to partying and drinking, and it can be easy to get caught up in the moment and drink or use drugs more than you should. However, it is important to know your limits so that you don’t end up doing something you regret or putting yourself in danger. If you do find yourself in a situation where you have had too much to drink, make sure you have a plan in place to get home safely.

 

  1. Be aware of your surroundings. Another way to avoid making poor decisions while away at college is to be aware of your surroundings. This means knowing who your friends are and being aware of your surroundings when you are out at night. If you feel like you are in a situation that is getting out of control or makes you feel uncomfortable, it is important to trust your gut and remove yourself from the situation. There is no shame in leaving a party or bar if you don’t feel safe—your safety is always more important than anything else.

 

  1. Think before you act. It can be easy to make impulsive decisions while away at college, but it is important to take a step back and think about the possible consequences of your actions before you do anything. This doesn’t mean you can’t let loose and have fun while you are away at school, but it does mean being mindful of the choices you are making and thinking about how they could affect your future.

 

Making poor decisions while away at college can have lasting consequences, so it is important to be mindful of the choices you are making. Know your personal limits when it comes to alcohol and drugs, be aware of your surroundings, and think before you act. By following these simple tips, you can help ensure that you make the best choices for yourself while away at school.

Keeping Your Anxiety Low When Choosing a College to Attend

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Written By Marc Lehman, Owner and Family Therapist at

U ARE HEARD LLC

The college selection process can be a daunting and anxiety-inducing time for both students and their parents. With so many schools to choose from and factors to consider, it’s no wonder that the majority of students report feeling stressed out during this time. However, there are ways to keep your anxiety low and make the process a bit less overwhelming.

Here are a few tips:

Create a List of Priorities

One of the best ways to narrow down your college choices is to create a list of priorities. What is most important to you? Do you want to be close to home? Do you want a school with a strong academic reputation? Do you want a school with a lot of extracurricular activities? Once you have answered these questions, you will be in a much better position to start making some decisions.

Do Your Research

Before making any final decisions, it is important to do your research. This means visiting the websites of each of the schools on your list, reading up on their programs and facilities, and talking to people who have attended or are currently attending the school. The more information you have, the easier it will be to make an informed decision.

Talk to Your Parents/Guardians

Your parents or guardians are likely helping you pay for college, so they should have a say in where you ultimately decide to go. Talk to them about your thoughts and feelings regarding the college selection process. They may have some sage advice that can help you make your decision.

Making the decision about which college to attend can be stressful, but it doesn’t have to be. By creating a list of priorities, doing your research, and talking to your parents or guardians, you can make the process much easier on yourself. So, take a deep breath and relax—you’ve got this!

 

Early Decision vs Regular Decision: Which is Right for You?

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Written By Marc Lehman, Owner and Family Therapist at

U ARE HEARD LLC

The college application process can be stressful, and one of the most difficult decisions you’ll have to make is whether to apply Early Decision or Regular Decision. Both have their pros and cons, so how do you know which one is right for you? Keep reading to find out everything you need to know about Early Decision vs Regular Decision so that you can make an informed decision for your future.

What is Early Decision?

Early Decision is a binding financial agreement between the student and the college. If the student is accepted, they are required to attend that school and withdraw all other applications. Early Decision applications are typically due in November, and students will receive their decision by mid-December.

What is Regular Decision?

Regular Decision applications are not binding, which means that students are not required to attend the school if they are accepted. Students will usually receive their decision January-March.

What are the Pros and Cons of Early Decision?

Applying Early Decision can increase your chances of getting into your first-choice school because admissions committees give priority to Early Decision applicants. Additionally, if you’re applying to a competitive school, applying Early Decision may increase your chances of being accepted since regular decision applicants make up a larger pool of applicants. On the flip side, however, if you’re not accepted into your first-choice school through Early Decision, you won’t have any other options since you’ve already committed to attending that school if accepted.

What are the Pros and Cons of Regular Decision?

The main advantage of applying Regular Decision is that it gives you more time to complete your applications and decide which schools you want to apply to. Additionally, if you’re not sure about your first-choice school or you’re worried about getting in, applying Regular Decision gives you the option of attending another school if you’re not accepted into your first choice. However, one downside to applying Regular Decision is that it may be harder to get into your top choice since there will be more applicants vying for spots.

Making the decision between Early Decision and Regular Decision can be tough, but it’s important to weigh all of the pros and cons before making a decision. Ultimately, the choice comes down to what’s best for YOU and YOUR future. Be sure to consult with your parents, teachers, or guidance counselors before making any final decisions.

How to Talk to Your College Student When Something is Wrong

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Written By Marc Lehman, Owner and Family Therapist at

U ARE HEARD LLC

Talking to your college student can be difficult. They are in a new environment, trying to make new friends and figure out who they are. When something is wrong, they may not want to tell you because they don’t want to worry you. But as their parent, you know them better than anyone else and you can see when something is off. So how can you get them to open up to you? Here are some tips:

  1. Talk about your own experiences.

Chances are, your college student is going through something that you have gone through before. Share your own stories and experiences with them in a way that shows that you understand what they are going through. This will help them feel more comfortable talking to you about what is going on in their life.

  1. Be patient.

Your college student may not be ready to talk to you right away. They may need some time to process what is going on in their life. Be patient and wait for them to come to you when they are ready to talk. It’s important that they feel like they can come to you when they need to without feeling judged or pressured.

  1. Listen more than talk.

When your college student does open up to you, it’s important that you listen more than you talk. Let them share their experiences and feelings with you without interruption. This will show them that you are truly listening and that you care about what they have to say. It’s also important not to offer advice unless they ask for it; just let them know that you are there for them no matter what.

Talking to your college student can be difficult, but it’s so important to keep the lines of communication open. They are going through a lot of changes and need someone who understands what they are going through. By sharing your own experiences, being patient, and listening more than you talk, you can show your college student that you are there for them no matter what.

I’m Failing My Classes and Haven’t Told My Parents…Now What?

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Written by Marc Lehman

Owner and Founder of U ARE HEARD LLC

It can be tough admitting that you’re not doing as well in college as you’d like (or as your parents expect). Maybe you took a few too many challenging classes, or maybe you just didn’t study as much as you should have. Whatever the reason, if you’re currently failing one or more of your college classes, it’s important to take action quickly. The sooner you address the issue, the better your chances of salvageable grades—and avoiding having to tell your parents.

Step 1: Talk to Your Professor(s) ASAP

Your first step should be to reach out to your professor(s). They may be able to give you some insight into what is causing your struggles and how you can improve. There may also be opportunities for extra credit or other assignments that can help boost your grade. However, even if there’s no magic solution, it’s important that your professor(s) know what is going on so they can support you in any way possible.

Step 2: Create a Plan to Boost Your Grades

Once you’ve talked to your professor (or professors), it’s time to create a plan of action. This may involve studying more, attending office hours, or meeting with a tutor. Whatever it is, make sure it’s something you’re actually willing and able to do—otherwise, you’re likely doomed to fail. And if possible, get started on this plan right away. The sooner you start making an effort to improve, the better your chances will be.

Step 3: Talk to Your Parents (If You Haven’t Already)

Depending on how far along in the semester you are, you may need to tell your parents about your struggles sooner rather than later. If grades have already been posted online or sent home, they’ll likely find out eventually regardless of whether or not you say anything. However, if possible, it’s best to take the initiative and tell them yourself—that way, you can put a positive spin on the situation and show that you’re taking steps to improve. Of course, this step may not be easy, but it will be much easier if you’ve already taken care of steps 1 and 2.

If you’re struggling in college, it’s important to take action quickly. Talk to your professor(s), create a plan to boost your grades, and talk to your parents (if necessary). The sooner you address the issue, the better your chances of salvaging your grades—and avoiding having to tell your parents.

Should You Track Your College Student’s Phone Using an App?

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Written By Marc Lehman, Owner and Family Therapist at

U ARE HEARD LLC

It can be tempting to want to keep tabs on your college student by tracking their phone using an app. After all, you want to make sure they’re safe and not getting into any trouble. But is it really a good idea? Let’s take a look at the pros and cons.

The Pros of Tracking Your College Student’s Phone

There are some benefits to tracking your child’s phone when they go to college. For one, you can see if they’re keeping up with their classes and getting good grades. You can also see if they’re hanging out with friends too much or skipping class. Additionally, if your child is ever in an emergency situation, you can use the GPS tracking feature on their phone to find them quickly.

The Cons of Tracking Your College Student’s Phone

However, there are also some downsides to tracking your child’s phone. For one, it invade their privacy and they may feel like you don’t trust them. Additionally, if they ever lose their phone or it gets stolen, the person who has it will have access to all of your personal information.

So, should you track your college student’s phone using an app? It really depends on the situation. If you feel like you need to because your child is struggling in school or getting into trouble, then go ahead and do it. But if you’re just curious about what they’re up to, you might want to think twice before invading their privacy.

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How to Make Friends in College

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Written By Marc Lehman, Owner and Family Therapist at

U ARE HEARD LLC

Making friends in college can be tough. You’re in a new environment, surrounded by people you don’t know. But don’t worry, there are plenty of ways to make friends in college. Keep reading to find out how.

  1. Get involved on campus. There are tons of clubs and organizations at most colleges, so there’s sure to be something that interests you. Getting involved in extracurricular activities is a great way to meet people with similar interests. Joining a club or organization will also give you a chance to get to know people outside of your classes.

 

  1. Take the AirPods out—-when you walk around with them in you are missing every opportunity to connect—in the dining hall, in the elevator in your dorm, in class, at the gym…

 

  1. Attend campus events. Colleges always have something going on, whether it’s a guest speaker, a concert, or a sports game. Attending campus events is a great way to meet new people and have fun at the same time. Even if you don’t know anyone, just striking up a conversation with someone can help you make a new friend.

 

  1. Live in the dorms. If you’re living off-campus, it can be harder to meet people since you’re not constantly surrounded by them like you would be if you lived in the dorms. Living in the dorms gives you more opportunities to meet people and socialize. Plus, it’s a great way to save money on rent!

 

Keep in mind most students on your campus are also trying to meet other people.  Use the 1/2/3 simple way of interacting if you get socially shy.

1) take a deep breath and introduce yourself—‘Hey I am Marc–good to meet you’

2) Where are you from?

3) what year are you?

Everyone has answers to these 3 questions—you just need to ask…

Making friends in college doesn’t have to be difficult. There are plenty of ways to meet people and make lasting friendships. Just remember to get involved on campus, attend campus events, and live in the dorms (if possible). With these tips, you’ll be sure to make plenty of friends in no time!

Marc Lehman

Owner and Founder of U ARE HEARD LLC

www.uareheard.com

 

 

The Top 5 Ways to Help Your College Freshman Thrive Socially, Emotionally and Academically

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Written By Marc Lehman, Owner and Family Therapist at

U ARE HEARD LLC

The college experience is a time of great exploration. For many students, it is the first time living away from home, making new friends and navigating coursework independently. While college can be an exciting time, it can also be challenging both socially and emotionally. As a parent, you may be wondering how you can best support your student during this transition.

Here are the top 5 ways to help your college freshman thrive socially, emotionally and academically:

  1. Encourage Them to Seek Out Counseling Services Early On

If your student is struggling to adjust to college life, encourage them to seek out counseling services early on. Many colleges offer counseling services to students, which can be incredibly helpful in managing stress, anxiety and depression. Virtual counseling has also become increasingly popular, as it allows students to receive counseling from the comfort of their own dorm room or apartment.

  1. Help Them Find Their Niche

One of the best ways to help your child thrive socially and emotionally in college is to help them find their niche. This could involve joining a club or student organization that aligns with their interests, participating in intramural sports or simply finding a group of friends with similar hobbies and interests. When students feel like they belong somewhere on campus, they are more likely to stick with it and succeed academically as well.

  1. Stay Connected but Respect Their Space

It can be tempting (and at times even necessary) to check in with your child frequently during their first year of college. However, it is important to respect their space and allow them to grow independently. While you should absolutely stay connected, try to limit yourself to weekly check-ins rather than daily calls or text messages. This will allow them the freedom to explore their new environment without feeling like they have to report back home every step of the way.

  1. Help Them Set Realistic Expectations

The first year of college can be brutal academically and socially – but that doesn’t mean it’s not worth it! Help your child set realistic expectations for their first year so that they know what they’re getting into and can better prepare themselves for the challenge ahead. It’s also important that you remind them that there is no shame in seeking out help when they need it – whether that means hiring a tutor or meeting with their professor outside of class.

  1. Celebrate Their Successes…Big and Small!

Last but not least, don’t forget to celebrate your child’s successes – big and small! Whether they land an internship, make the Dean’s List or simply survive their first semester away from home, take the time to acknowledge their hard work and remind them how proud you are of their accomplishments. A little positive reinforcement can go a long way in helping them stay motivated throughout their college career!

College can be an exciting but challenging time for students – but with the right support from parents, it doesn’t have to be overwhelming! By following these simple tips, you can help your freshman thrive socially, emotionally and academically throughout their first year (and beyond).

Marc Lehman

Owner and Founder of U ARE HEARD LLC

www.uareheard.com

The College Mental Health Crisis – What Parents Need to Know ‘in Lehman’s Terms’

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Written By Marc Lehman, Owner and Family Therapist at

U ARE HEARD LLC

It’s no secret that college is a time of stress and anxiety for many students. From the pressure of classes and exams to the social challenges of making new friends, there are plenty of opportunities for things to go wrong. And, unfortunately, mental health issues are on the rise among college students. In fact, a recent study found that anxiety and depression are now the most common health concerns among college students. So, what’s behind this mental health crisis? And what can parents do to help their kids?

The Pressure of College Life

There are a number of factors that can contribute to mental health problems in college students. For one thing, the transition to college life can
be a difficult one. Students may feel homesick or isolated, especially if they’re attending school far from home. Additionally, the academic pressure of college can be overwhelming for some students. With big exams and important papers due, it’s easy to feel like you’re constantly under stress.

The Social Scene

Another factor that can contribute to mental health problems in college students is the social scene. For many students, college is the first time they’re living away from home and surrounded by peers their own age. This can be both exciting and intimidating. There may be pressure to party or drink alcohol, which can lead to problems down the road. Additionally, students may struggle to find their place in the social hierarchy of college life. All of these factors can contribute to feelings of anxiety or depression.

What Can Parents Do?

If you’re the parent of a college student, there are a few things you can do to help your child through this difficult time. First and foremost, it’s important to stay involved in your child’s life and be there for them when they need you. Additionally, you should encourage your child to seek out help if they’re struggling with their mental health. There are a number of resources available on and off campus, such as counseling services or support groups. Finally, you should make sure you’re staying up-to-date on the latest news and research about college mental health so that you can be prepared to help your child if they need it.

The mental health crisis among college students is real and parents need to be aware of the signs of stress and anxiety in their children. If you suspect your child is struggling, don’t hesitate to reach out for help from campus resources or professionals specializing in adolescent mental health. By being involved and informed, you can make sure your child gets the help they need during this challenging time in their lives.

How to Easily Navigate the Stressors of Going Back to School and Anxiety

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You’re not alone if you’re feeling overwhelmed about returning to school. The stress of a new school year can be tough to manage, but there are ways to make it easier on yourself. In this blog post, we’ll discuss some stress relief tips that can help make the transition back to school a little bit easier. We’ll also talk about how to deal with anxiety during this time. Follow these tips, andyou’ll be well on your way to a successful semester!

One of the most important things you can do to reduce stress is to plan. This means getting your supplies ready early, mapping out your schedule, and knowing what to expect in each of your classes. Doing some of the work ahead of time will make you feel more prepared and less stressed when the school year begins.

It’s also important to take time before the semester starts. Make sure you get enough rest so that you’re feeling refreshed and ready to tackle whatever comes your way. And don’t forget to eat healthily! A nutritious diet will help improve your mood and energy levels, which are essential for dealing with stress.

Lastly, stay positive and remember that you’re capable of succeeding. It’s also helpful to talk to someone who understands what you’re going through, like a friend or family member. And finally, don’t hesitate to seek professional help if your anxiety affects your life.

For Parents  

Tips to Ease Your Child’s Back-to-School Anxiety

  • A week or two before school, start preparing children for the upcoming transition by resuming school-year routines, such as setting a realistic bedtime and selecting tomorrow’s clothes.
  • Arrange to play dates with one or more familiar peers before school starts. Research shows that the presence of a typical peer during school transitions can improve children’s academic and emotional adjustment.
  • Visit the school before the school year begins, rehearse the drop-off and spend time on the playground or inside the classroom if the building is open. Have your child practice walking into class while you wait outside or down the hall.
  • Come up with a prize or a rewarding activity that the child could earn for separating from mom or dad to attend school.
  •  Validate the child’s worry by acknowledging that, like any new activity, starting school can be hard but soon becomes easy and fun.

With these stress relief tips in mind, you’ll be ready to face the new school year confidently! Just take things one step at a time and focus on caring for yourself. You got this!

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